4 reasons its unacceptable to wear white hockey gloves

Is it acceptable to wear white hockey gloves on mens league? Actually is it even acceptable to wear white hockey gloves at all unless you play for Boston University? White gloves are the kind of statement that say i’m here boys and i’m going to undress you at least 3 times before having a yard sale with the goalies equipment. White hockey gloves are loud, they’re obnoxious but damn they look hot. In soccer white cleats used to mean you were the best player on the field. In hockey white gloves should mean you’re the best player on the ice right? Not some scrub pretending the no hit league you play in is the NHL Stanley Cup Finals.

4. If these guys were playing hockey for fun and just knocking the puck around I would be fine with white gloves. You know make a few passes, cycle, get the guys who can’t skate a few goals and then wow everyone 3 to 5 times a night going bar down. The thing is these guys don’t. You prance around and just aggravate everyone on the ice with you.  You’re the No Passer.

3. Chances are you wear a half visor to and complain when a stick from a beginner hockey player comes up to high. (Yo bro. Visors are made for leagues where everyone uses them and knows how to play with them) nott the Wednesday night pick up league.

3.The white hockey gloves actually make you a bigger asshole then you would be without them. Chances are you’re a hacker, you cry every time someone bumps you, and you have never heard of passing the puck to anyone. In fact the only reason you look so good in the white hockey gloves is because it’s a no hit league. Otherwise someone would crack you coming across the blue line and oh…………you would skate like an epic pussy afterwards.

2. If your playing with white hockey gloves in pick up hockey games chances are your a north and south skater. You have never heard of going east to west, you have no idea what a cycle is, and a proper break out? Please. Your going to pick up the puck around the red line and skate directly towards the goal. The best part? When you do make a pass it will either be behind the winger or to late and your going to sigh like the player should have scored off of your lousy play. Nice job bro.

1. If you’re wearing white hockey gloves and you didn’t play Juniors, or college, you better be humble because everyone is laughing at you during warm ups at the other end of the ice. Let your game speak for itself. Don’t let your equipment try to make a statement for you.

Side Note: White Hockey Gloves are sick just don’t do any of the above if your going to wear them.